Tag: horoscope

  • Your Weekly Horoscope

    How many blondes does it take to check a horoscope? Aries  (March 21 – April 19) -Pation.     Taurus (April 20 – May 20) You may or may not die within 3 days.     Gemini (May 21 – June 20) You’re a diamond in the rough, or at least cubic zirconium.     Cancer (June 21 –…

    Your Weekly Horoscope
  • Your Weekly Horoscope

    How the dice trembles: luck be your mistress in this week’s horoscope Aries  (March 21 – April 19) I see you shiver with antici-     Taurus (April 20 – May 20) When life doesn’t give you a door, make a window. Or a large gaping hole in some wall that could pass as a window.  …

    Your Weekly Horoscope
  • Your Weekly Horoscope

    Happy pre-Thanksgiving weekend. Here’s the horoscope that’ll get you through next week. Aries (March 21 – April 19) You may be home for the holidays, but are you home at all?     Taurus (April 20 – May 20) Gobble up as much as you can. This may be your last chance.       Gemini (May 21…

    Your Weekly Horoscope
  • Your Weekly Horoscope

    Good luck with finals; here’s this week’s horoscope to make you feel better. Aries (March 21 – April 19) The ghost next to you has a crush on you.     Taurus (April 20 – May 20) Remember that song? Good luck.       Gemini (May 21 – June 20) This week, the pizza…

    Your Weekly Horoscope
  • Your Weekly Horror-scope

    Here’s your horror-scope in honor of All Hallows’ Eve. May you avoid the draft for the Skeleton War.   Aries (March 21 – April 19) You’re feeling uneasy for a reason, just ask the man behind you!     Taurus (April 20 – May 20)  The dark clouds are leading you to an even darker…

    Your Weekly Horror-scope
  • Your Weekly Horoscope

    Here’s your horoscope for the week of May 21 – May 27.  We took the stars out on a date.  Took them dancing, had a nice dinner.  Got to know them better, you know?  We hope this reflects that. Aries (March 21 – April 19) Try something adventurous with your hair this week. You won’t…

    Your Weekly Horoscope